“Another reason for cherishing others is that it is the best method to solve our own and others’ problems. Problems, worry, pain, and unhappiness are types of mind; they are feelings and do not exist outside the mind.” – Geshe Kelsang Gyatso from Eight Steps to Happiness
The end of this work week marks the end of the dramatic A incident. He sent a nasty email on Tuesday highlighting 8 errors, of which 4 are commas or the lack thereof, the other 4 are about the usage of “in FY11 or for FY11” in my press release. I was so disturbed over the issue that I stayed in on Wednesday just to clear my mind. On Thursday, I received another nasty email and this time I was so irritated that I drafted a reply to him. Luckily though, my immediate boss stopped me in time. He promised to talk to A and express the frustrations I had with him.
Turns out, A was a lot more receptive than I thought he would be and told my immediate boss that he would not be that harsh towards me. I guess that was what I needed, for him to be aware of the stress that he has been giving me.
Point is, I realised had i stepped up to tell him that he was causing unnecessary stress, the problem would have been solved very early on. Instead, I let it simmer in me, making me a lot unhappier than I needed to be. The problem exists but it was aggravated when mixed with my feelings of injust and anger. A lot of wasted hours of stress and unhappiness.
Next time, it would probably be ideal if i can separate my problems from feelings. Approaching the problem with a calm and peaceful mind, together with good communication, will serve to solve the issue more efficiently.